Just been over to Si's blog at http://wilkonews.blogspot.com/ and discovered his post about silly names. Working off his list, my name comes out as..
.......Sloopy Dippindoodle!
Big Bruv would be Dipsy Gizzardbutt and my Sister is Dorfus Farkletush!
Go give it a try, it's fun!
Love Azzy
X
A man left work on Friday (pay day), he stayed out all weekend partying and drinking with the boys and spending his pay packet.
When he finally got home Sunday night, his wife barraged him for two hours.
Finally his wife said "How would you like it if you didn't see me for two or three days?"
To which he replied "That would be fine with me"
Monday went by and he didn't see his wife.
Tuesday and Wednesday came and went with the same results.
Then on Thursday, the swelling had gone down just enough where he could see her a little out of the corner of his left eye!
What is the speed of dark?
Who puts those 'Thin Ice' signs out there?
Where does the guy who has everything put it all?
Why do kamikaze pilots wear crash helmets?
If one synchronised swimmer drowns, do the rest have to drown too?
If, for people who like peace and quiet, there is a phoneless cord?
If a shin is a device for finding furniture in the dark?
These were discovered in a book I read recently.
Accident.
Der Bleddinmess
Backfire.
Der Loudenbangenmekkenjumpen
Bonnet.
Pullknob und Knucklechopper
Breathalyser.
Der Puffitinten fur Pistenarsen
Clutch.
Die Kuplink mit Schlippenshaken
Cyclist.
Der Pedallpushink Pillokken
Double white lines.
Ovatakken und Krunschen
Exhaust.
Spitzenpoppenbangentuben
Exhaust fumes.
Der Koffenund Schpittpoluter
Foot brake.
Der Edbangeronvindshcreenen Stoppenquik
Gear lever.
Der Biggenshticken fur Kangaroochoppen
Indicators.
Die Blinkenleiten Tickentocken
Seat belt.
Der Klunkenklikken Frauleintrapper
Windscreen wiper.
Der Flippenflappenmuckenschpredder
Learner driver.
Der Twatten mit Elplates
I very rarely read newspapers but got one over the weekend, best bit in it was a joke that is going round on the internet -
President Bush was told that three Brazillian soldiers had died in Iraq, to everyone's amazement he went chalk white, put his head in his hands and groaned. Eventually his chief of staff asked what was wrong. The president whimpered: "Just how many IS a Brazillion?"
Rarely read them, never believe them,
Would rather read Beano or Dandy.
Papers tell of the wars and the probable (?) cause,
But report more on Politicians who're randy.
Epidemics, disease, Oh my God! Do not sneeze!
Quick run out and get your injections.
Papers have said, though you're on your death bed,
"Don't forget we have postal Elections!"
Who wants to learn how much footballers earn?
There's more to life than just money.
Papers help instil fear, year after year,
I'd rather read something that's funny!
Azzitizz.
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