HARD TIMES

Hi there everyone, apologies for long gap in posts.

Been busy looking for somewhere to live, it's hard, there are plenty of flats/apartments/houses available but I am having difficulties finding somewhere as not many places want a DSS tenant on permanent sick (DSS = Department of Social Services) even though my benefits from the DSS would cover the cost of the rent. Seems DSS people have a bad reputation here in the UK and even more so if you are a single Mum! Never realised before how hard it is until now!

We have been placed on the Council housing list but only on 'Standard rate'
I could get somewhere quicker if I accepted moving to a homeless hostel in a real bad area which is miles away from where we are now and Little'Uns school, plus we have no transport so I said 'no thanks'. That means we were placed on 'Standard' and it could take up to five years for them to find us somewhere. It took them three years to house Li'l Sis' and all she wanted was a little one bedroomed flat, so in the meantime, I am looking for private rented properties but have a limit to how much the rent can be.

The atmosphere at home at the moment is not nasty but not very pleasant either, actually not much has changed since I told him I was leaving, I'm still invisible and he still talks to the dog more than me.
He disappears to the pub or his meetings, I never know where he is or what time he will be back, whether to cook a meal or not, a couple of times when I have and I have told him it will be ready when he returns, he has actually come home with a takeaway or come home first, said he didn't fancy what I had cooked, then gone back out for a takeaway!
He is off work at the moment with 'depression', so I am trying to keep out of the house as much as possible so we don't start rowing, he mainly stays in bed but when he does come down, it feels kind of awkward.


I am still struggling with money trying to find Little'Uns lunch money or buy her things. He doesn't help! The other week (on a Friday) I asked if he could pay for her lunch money for the following week as I had no money, he said OK, I asked for it on the Saturday and he said he would go to the ATM Sunday, I texted him while he was out on Sunday to remind him and he said OK, when he got home that evening I asked had he got it for me and he said "No, I will give it you tomorrow" Monday morning came and I asked for her lunch money for the week but he only gave me £5 ($2.50) he eventually gave me the balance on the Wednesday after a lot more asking or as he puts it 'nagging'!

She needs a new school jumper, the sleeves on the two she has are so short they look like she has them rolled up to her elbows because she is growing so fast, she could do with a decent pair of winter boots too, she is wearing an old pair of mine (two sizes too big but with thick socks they will do) at the moment.
I missed a decent pair at the local 'Age Concern' charity shop last week because my child benefit went into the wrong account and got swallowed up by the overdraft so I was stuck for money, I tried to request it back as it was CHILD benefit, but the bank said "no chance" so now I am down by £78 (approx $37) and I receive nothing until a week this coming Wednesday.

I know, I know, winge, winge, moan, moan! But I'm just sick to death of it all. I wouldn't be in such a mess with the bank if I hadn't agreed to have his wages paid into my account and for me to pay the bills and sort the budget for us.
Which, would have, or should have, been a good thing as I am very, very good at budgeting but unfortnately he then started demanding my cash card as his wages were going in and he needed money to get to work etc. but he would always draw out more than he put in so I then couldn't budget, things stopped being paid on time and I started to struggle, there was not much left of my benefit and eventually the overdraft was horrendous and the rows started really bad. Then... surprise...surprise... his firm kept 'accidentally' paying his wages into his savings account each month instead of my account and I couldn't pay anything at all!!!!!!
The bank charges got worse and worse, he kept telling me he would clear it all up and pay me back and now I'm in severe debt too!

Mum wrote him a nice letter requesting the £1200 he borrowed about a year ago and he wrote a nice letter back promising to start paying her back in instalments starting two weeks ago, guess what?..... he hasn't paid her a penny!!!!


Oh well, guess it serves us right for being so bloody stupid!!!

I'll try and post again soon.

Hope you are all having a better time than we are.

Love Azzy.
XX

2 comments:

i beati said...

There is a lot to thinking and visualizing as better life.

Have you run an ad asking for a place to stay maybe boarder orhouse comapnion - you could care for someone in exchange for living???just thoughts and sending love sandy

Anonymous said...

I'm sorry to hear you are having troubles. I sincerely hope things brighten up for you.